I have been in a long term relationship with my boyfriend for three years. We have been living together. We have had an active sex life and we both enjoyed the intimacy. But somehow the magic of sex is fading for me. I still like the intimacy part but I do not want to engage in the sexual intercourse part even though my partner does. He is very supportive about what I am going through but I feel as if I am doing wrong to him by not giving what he wants. At times I can see the frustration on his face. Maybe I am too tired or just want a little space of my own. What should I do?

Dear Intimate-22,

Thanks for writing in. It looks like you are in a tight spot emotionally. I sense that you are feeling a mixture of guilt and the need to have your own space. Sex can get monotonous at times especially if your relationship is not growing in other aspects as well. It is great that he is supportive and it’s natural that you feel guilty for not being able to respond to him the way he would like. His frustration is natural as well but if you gave in to him then you would be the one feeling the frustration. Like you said, maybe you are tired and need some space of your own. It could be possible that you are both growing in different directions or maybe at different paces. This can take away from the spark you had earlier. But the best thing to do would be for the two of you to talk about it.