The Day I Learned, The Day I Died

Click here to listen to the recitation of this poem.
(Recitation by Sagun Dhakhwa)

Standing on the edge of a cliff, staggering on uncertainties
Breathing frustrations, echoing obscenities

Always tangled onto the mess, and always cornered and stressed
Feels like this youth is laying on waste just to decay
Don't know what my future means to me, as mirage it seems, 
And so are my elusive dreams, fighting the battle of life,
Drifting in futility, wondering how far they can reach

I just wish if only the mirror could reflect my real picture,
Or should I peel the skin from the flesh, 
And the flesh from the bone to see what remains there after all,
Or to see the soul clashing with the body for evasion,
Should the skull be smashed on the concrete wall?

Ain't there any easy way to exit from this hell of tensions?
Couldn't find any solutions for these messy confusions
To see my life in this poor situation was surely not my desire
Couldn't understand myself all this life, howsoever I tried

But, now it's too late to put out the flames of fire
Couldn't find the time for myself, but now I'm getting old and tired
Now, my penitence nor my penance won't gain salvation and remedy

A blade in the shivering hand slashed the veins distressingly
The oozing blood from the ruptured wrist is for real
The screaming pain and pulsating heartbeats are for real

Soon, the consciousness will end up in silence, and peace will shine
A death is just an other facet of life, divided by a thin line